The Chipped Cup

Today...I was dragging, and my clouded mind thought it was due to the fact that I did not sleep much last night because of all the heart-racing fun that was going on inside my chest.  But I realized it was probably because of my new habit of going decaf from now on...that started this morning.  I'm not sure why I can't remember that cold turkey is a difficult thing.

But anyway...while I was staring into space in the direction of my computer monitor this morning, an email popped into my inbox.  I noticed it was from my sister so I opened it immediately.  She had written something so sweet for me and it reminded me that our relationships are one of the most important aspect of our lives.  So...my sister, Patti, is my guest blogger today...

The Chipped Cup

When I was in high school I had a boyfriend.  He was wrong for me in every way.  One day I realized that he was crushing my hopes to go away to college, a college I had dreamed of going to for a very long time.  So after much thought, I decided to break up with him.  We were drinking pop (what we called the soda in the fridge at the time) from a glass out of the kitchen.  These glasses were supposedly unbreakable, but when he threw his across the front porch, after I broke up with him, it surely did chip.  After that day you would have thought the glass would have been no good and would have been thrown out, but for some reason it kept showing up in the cabinet with its family of green drinking glasses.  Every time the glass was used it was a reminder of that boy, the road I was headed down with him and the wise decision I had made obviously led by the Holy Spirit.  I assume the glass was eventually thrown away, much like my memories of the bad experience of the break up.

I tell that story because this morning when I watched my cup filling with my yummy coffee I happened to notice a chip in my cup.  The chip made me smile because this time the chip represented a much happier memory.  A while back my sister and her husband had traveled to Austin during a weekend we were away - probably at a swim meet. They stayed at my house and after the weekend was over my lovely sister told me that when she was putting her coffee cup in the dishwasher it had chipped.   So when I use that cup it reminds me of my sister that I miss so much, and of the time she and her husband were making themselves at home in my home.  She was very upset when she told me she broke it and probably even asked if she could replace it.  What my sister doesn't realize is that she added value to that cup that day.  The value in the chip comes from the building of our relationship over years.  I have known her her whole life and have watched her grow and develop into a beautiful, caring person who loves God above all.  Often through the week I will think of my sister and text her a thought, lyrics to a song or just something I wanted to tell her.  It makes me feel in touch and close to her.  Many times when something is eating either of us we will call each other and vent.  Inevitably at the end of the vent session the other will encourage with God's Word.  This relationship is so above and beyond just being sisters.  It is absolutely a gift from God.  To be able to speak truth into her life and receive truth from her has been the secret to many trials with raising a family and being married to the same busy, high maintenance man for 23 years.  I treasure my sister and I treasure the chipped cup because it makes me remember to be thankful for the beautiful blessings God has entrusted me with.  So I sit here and drink my yummy full cup of almond joy creamer in my coffee and I am starting my day with a full cup.  Full of joy and thankfulness.

Patti Thompson
12/4/2012


I love this for so very many obvious reasons.  But, it makes me think, also, about how broken and chipped we all are.  Nicks and cracks caused either by the ups and downs of life, our own past mistakes...or...by someone else.  We are tempted to look at that and wish we were put together better; that we hadn't made that one decision; or that we had avoided that person when we had the opportunity.    It's easy to devalue ourselves and the journey we've walked.  But I believe when God looks at us, He thinks our brokenness adds value.

Crank it up...

I am sitting here watching Christmas movies today, and for that I am elated, because if you know me at all you understand just how much I love the holidays.  Especially Christmas.  However, I am doing all the watching in my shorts and flip flops.  And I'm not going to lie...I just don't know how I feel about that.  It is December.  It is supposed to be cold and the visions of a wintry scene right outside my frost-laden window should not be so far from reality.  But it is what it is...therefore, I will give thanks that I woke up today with the ability to get dressed, attend church to hear sound Bible teaching, and spend the rest of the day with a good, good man who loves me far better than I have ever deserved.

Thankful.

And while I'm on the subject of Thankful, our Thanksgiving holiday was fabulous.  I had the whole week off work and it was the sweetest gift of time.  I cooked and baked and laughed and rested and was able to crank up the Christmas music while I decorated my tree and mantle and other stuff.  And the fact that I said 'crank up' is a dead give-a-way as to where I'm from.  Anyway...we split our actual Thanksgiving day between the hubs side of the family and mine.  Here are a few snapshots of our time with them.

 We ate a LOT!!

And I am even more excited because I just saw on Twitter today that Beth Moore will be leading a year-long scripture memory venture again in 2013.  I participated in this in 2011 and let me just say that it was the most life-changing practice I've ever implemented in my life.   I have always been very prone to a negative thought life and for so long I lived in defeat because of it.  I never understood how to overcome that, and well...I'll tell ya...I found when I did this that scripture memory is powerful and is crucial to transforming your thought life.  And if I can do it...anyone can.  So I am going to participate again in 2013.  Please join me.  You won't regret it.

Happy Sunday.

Favorites...

This time change may just get the best of me. At 6:00 p.m. I think it's 9:30 and am ready to get in bed…and when I realize it's only 6:00, I just get on the couch. And fall asleep. And then I wake up at 3:30 a.m. And then at 6:00 I'm ready for bed and it's not time so I fall asleep on the couch and then wake up at 3:30. It's like when you give a mouse a cookie. Or a moose a muffin. Or…groundhog day. Whatever.

But that's not really why I'm writing this blog entry.

Often I will have friends ask me for a book or website or a scripture to go to when they are needing help with something…ya know…like a self-help issue. And the only reason is because I know of a lot of resources in the self-help area…not because I'm the expert…but because I'm usually reading a self-help book or browsing a self-help site or searching scripture for my own issues that need help.

I've found that in all my searching and browsing, I tend to find gems from the same resources over and over. So here is a list of my favorite places to go when I'm needing wisdom.

God's Word
Beth Moore-One Place
LPM Blog
Proverbs 31 Ministries
Lysa Terkeurst
Marriage Today
Love and Respect
Boundaries

And these are the books and studies that have been most life-changing for me...

Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend
Esther: It's Tough Being A Woman
No Other Gods
Unglued

God never promised a life of ease for believers...

...In the world you will have trouble. But take heart; I have overcome the world. John 16:33b

But He does give us help along the journey. And He promises:

Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened to you. Matthew 7:7

Fifty seven...fifty nine...

It's been a busy Fall, and I'm not believing that we will be getting high on tryptophan in less than two weeks.  It has totally snuck up on me and I'm still trying to find a minute or two to get my Fall Pinterest project underway.  The verdict is not yet in, but it may not happen this year. Just a sneaking suspicion I'm having.

On October 29th, my folks celebrated 57 years of marriage. Fifty seven!  Y'all.  That's a long time, and I'm filled with admiration and respect for these two who have been committed through a lifetime of ups and downs.  They have been and continue to be a wonderful example to me, my siblings, and all their children.

Here they are 57 years ago...



And here they are now...



To me, they don't look old enough to have been married that long. 

I also finally got my little workout group off the ground.  Well...somewhat. I did one month and decided earlier this week that I need to pull back through the end of the year, and restart them in January. I think that will be a better time of year for getting a workout group started.  Ya know...with all the New Year's resolutions and goals and what not.

And while we're on the subject of what not, I need to vent for a minute about something that happened to me three times in less than two weeks.  Now...before I step up onto my soap box, I want to say that this has nothing to do with money. At all. But everything to do with the principle of it and the unfortunate attitude of entitlement that plagues our society. So...not once. Or twice.  But three times...at three different restaurants...our waiters have decided to round the amount of change they give back to us in their favor.  So...for example...our ticket at the last restaurant was something like $23.41. We paid with two twenty dollar bills...and expected to get back $16.59. Instead we were given $16 even. Our waiter decided that he would just pocket the $.59 for himself. And really...59 cents is nothing to get rattled over. I already know that. And yes...I can be a tight wad at times, but I always take very good care of waiters with my tip.  But y'all...a tip is a gift...a gift of appreciation for good service. It is not something that is owed you automatically just because you are a waiter. And it is at the discretion of the customer as to how much is given.  Right?

The first two times it happened, we just let it go, and left...annoyed. But at the last restaurant, B decided to ask where the rest of our change was. And the waiter's answer appalled me even more than the audacity he had to short change us. He said, "Oh I didn't mean to do that. I don't carry change with me."  And then just stood there like 'sorry dude but that's how I roll'.  And he didn't even offer to go get the rest of our change. 

Blah. 

Can't stand the attitude of entitlement.

Anyway. I will let it go now.

But does anyone have 59 cents I can borrow?  😜

Beauty for ashes...

Sometimes I can blow situations and circumstances up in my mind to dimensions mighty bigger than they really are.  And sometimes when I do that, I wear it all over. My face, my shoulders, my emotions, and my mood. And not only am I clothed that way, I spray it all over those who come near.  I snap at my husband; I roll my eyes at the new waitress who can't get my order right, or I engage in a monologue about how idiotic the slow driver is in front of me.  

Last week I had a couple days like that. I was torn up with fear over some things over which I had no control.  And no matter how I tried to work it out in my mind, I couldn't find the comfort or the peace that I was longing to feel.  I felt helpless, hopeless, and out of control.  And I was.

After a couple days of frustration, fear, little sleep, and knots in my stomach I finally went to the Place where my Christian upbringing and head knowledge told me I should've gone first.  To God's Word…and to God…Himself.  And as long as I have been a believer, and as much as He has brought me through, I was still somewhat skeptical that I would get up feeling any better.  I decided to believe anyway that He could and that He would…I just didn't know when He would.  And whispered through my tears, "I'm scared."

Now…I'm not a mom, but I'm fairly certain that if I were and my terrified child came to me in tears, I wouldn't ignore her…or him.  I believe that even if I could not make the situation change immediately, I would say whatever I needed to turn that frown upside down so that my child could carry on with fullness of life and childlike demeanor.

Pardon me while I veer for a moment with some Bible history...  

Jews were not allowed to enter the King's gates if they were wearing their mourning clothes…and just so you know...their mourning clothes were made up of sackcloth - which is course clothing - itchy and uncomfortable I'm sure, and ashes on their forehead.  So I'm sure it was obvious to onlookers and passers by who was torn up and in mourning.  An example of this is found in the OT book of Esther.  

Mordecai, Esther's cousin, learned of a plot from Haman, one of the King's right hand men, to destroy the Jews.  This catapulted Mordecai into a state of mourning…and I'm sure…frightened him right out of his mind.  His only hope was his cousin, Esther, because she was already inside the King's courts...she had been made Queen Esther not too long before that.  And through a series of events, Esther was able to approach the King and persuade him to get rid of Haman and save the Jews, thus lifting the burden off of Mordecai, herself, and all Jews who had been under the threat.  

Fast forward to 2012…a lot has happened since Esther and Mordecai walked the planet.  

One thing that happened…a pretty major event…was that God sent His Son to die on a cross for us.  And because of that, we no longer have to put our hope in someone who is already inside our King's court.  We can boldly approach His throne wearing our fears, worries, and angsts, and He will replace our sackcloth and ashes with something beautiful.

Isaiah 61:3 (NLT)

To all who mourn in Israel,

    he will give a crown of beauty for ashes,

a joyous blessing instead of mourning,

    festive praise instead of despair.

In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks

    that the Lord has planted for his own glory.

So...I opened up my bible and the verse I opened up to was a verse that I've read a million times…at least.  But this time the message I got from the verse was completely different than anything I've ever understood it to be.  And my tears poured out…not because I was afraid, but because my King had heard me!  I approached His throne…scared right out of my mind…and stood up with a fresh perspective on my situation and a joy so deep and so immense that there was no longer any room for fear.  And because of that, it not only changed my day that day, but it changed my week...giving me sustenance and patience far beyond my own to wait things out.  Doors opened that I would not have seen open had I lingered in fear mode.  But it wasn't anything I did.  I just took all that I had and He made a trade with me.

Beauty for ashes.  I want more.

Tubayta tubotta...

I have a confession. It's October 2nd and I have been getting the holidays on with Christmas music! It's true, and I am not ashamed! Now there are those people out there, and you may be one of them, who balk at the atrocity that stores bring out the Christmas merchandise so early...while its still warm enough for a suntan...and what have you. But I am not one of them. Because when I hear Christmas music I feel cozy and warm and wonderful memories fill my mind and visions of sugarplums dance in my head...even though I have no idea what a sugarplum is. And to the core I feel a sense of joy that is indescribable. And who doesn't need a little indescribable joy in the midst of the rat race that surrounds us?

But that's not the reason I'm writing. I just really needed to get that off my chest. Don't judge.

The real reason I'm writing is to talk about a workout method that has not been around for too terribly long, and one that I am sold on. It is called the Tabata method and it is the bomb! I've used the method a few times on my own and thought I would try it out in my class today. And durn...I'm already sore! Now I know that is not a good way to make you want to run out and try it, but trust me...it is a good way to work out if you are interested in actually transforming your body instead of just talking about it.

Some highlights of this style...

• You can do it by yourself
• You don't need any equipment
• It's easy to remember
• It is perfect way to workout if you are crunched for time
• It engages both the aerobic and anaerobic system so that you continue to burn calories after your workout is over

An example of a 20 minute Tabata workout might look like this:

Exercise 1 - 4 Minutes
Body weight squats (8X)

Exercise 2 - 4 Minutes
Tricep Dips (8X)

Exercise 3 - 4 Minutes
Mountain Climbers (8X)

Exercise 4 - 4 Minutes
Dead Lifts (8X)

Exercise 5 - 4 Minutes
Bicycle crunch (8X)

And...ALWAYS warm up and ALWAYS cool down and stretch!

And then turn on a little Christmas music and find a little joy!

Big white collars and wooden necklaces...

Well all teachers started back to school on Tuesday; our whole school district convocated today (and the squiggly little red line tells me that convocated is not a word but I really don't care tonight); and we are all exhausted and already counting down the days till summer 2013. So I guess it's official...my 22nd year in the profession is well underway.

22 years.

Twenty-two years has come to pass in an instant and I know I sound like my grandma when I say this, but my...how time flies! And I can recall my very first ever day of teaching. It's as vivid as what I did today. Ok...well...I don't remember what I did 5 minutes ago but that is neither here nor there. But anyway...my first day of teaching was memorable to say the least and I even remember what I wore. A blue t-shirt dress with white flowers all over it, a white doily detachable collar, white lace hose, and navy blue shoes with a big gold button on top. Oh...and my wooden schoolhouse necklace and wooden apple earrings. It was quite picturesque. Really. I wore units on the second day! Anyone remember those?

Now...the actual teaching and interaction with the kids isn't so fresh anymore. It was the after school fiasco that haunts my memory.

I happened to be living with my mom and dad when I got my first teaching job. My rookie salary did not afford me the luxury of renting an apartment AND having transportation. I had to pick one. So I chose transportation. But because it was only my first day, I had not received a paycheck yet so I was still driving a piece of work. To and from work. My dad also drove that car sometimes.

As you are well aware, MUCH has changed in 22 years. It may come as a shock to some of you yunguns, but back then we did not have cars that told you how many miles you had left on your tank of gas. And there was no sound alert or gas light or digital anything. I know. Crazy. The little meter needle would just rise toward F when you filled your tank and fall toward the E as you drove around and burned gas. But sometimes they did not work so well. And the tired little needle on the gauge would just rest in one spot for a while. And when you are not the only driver of a car, you may or may not know whether your tank is full, half-full, or dry as a bone.

My dad thought I put gas in it. I thought he put gas in it. And the sad little teacher with her white lace hose and big doily collar walked all the way home in the Texas heat on her first day of school.

22 years ago.

The ABCs of warming tostada shells...

If there were a gold medal for acting quickly to save the house from burning to the ground, my husband would have won it. Hands down.

It happened quickly...in the blink of an eye. Which...I'm pretty sure fires in most homes are impromptu and don't occur with time to prep for it. But anyway...I literally turned my back to the toaster oven...the one that was supposed to be warming my tostada shells...for less than a minute in order to pour the lettuce into the bowl. And when I turned back around to see what the smokey smell was, my toaster oven was on fire.

FIRE!

All I could do was yell, "Bra Bra Bra Bra"! I couldn't even get the d on the end of his name. And when he heard me he came running. And I'll tell ya...it's a good thing he was home because I totally panicked. And in my panic, instead of leaving the toaster oven closed, I opened the door and gave it a little oxygen. I thought it needed a little help growing into huge flames that reached quickly for my cabinets.

Brad turned the faucet on, pulled the sprayer out as far as it would go and took a shot. Thankfully, it reached exactly as far as the flames...and not a smidge further. It sizzled, died, and smoke filled the room...and I...well, I lost feeling in my legs! That's the closest I've ever come to something like that. And, ummmm, I'm fairly certain that's the closest I ever want to be to my house burning down.

Now I need a new toaster.

And a fire extinguisher.

But not a new house. Phew!!

Desperately seeking structure...

I'm thinking it's time to get back to the world of the 3D people. I only say this because of the cartwheel I tried to perform when I realized a couple weeks ago that it was Wednesday...and that means one thing. Wednesdays = Dallas! And there's only one thing that could be better that might make me turn a cartwheel AND a roundoff...and well...that would be if they brought back Knots Landing. Oh yes...that...would be a good day. And the fact that I've given time and space on my blog to talk about this makes me KNOW that it's time for some structure in my life. Time to put things in proper perspective and deal with reality.

So...because I'm so badly needing structure, I will blog in list form today. It's tidy and orderly, don't you think?

1. The Olympics. I have loved watching the Olympics this year. Swimming, in particular, is my favorite mostly because two people I love very much are swimmers and I know some about the sport. But...Missy Franklin...OH MY WORD! She's a beast in the water and it has been a joy to watch her spank the rest of the world. And...of course...Michael Phelps...now the most decorated Olympian in history. Who doesn't love that? I cannot watch an event without crying. I'm a mess over the Olympics.

2. Garden Ridge. I love that place. I mean...you have to kinda dig through all the stuff...but they have some great inexpensive home decorations. And lots of other stuff, too. And best of all, I found some great decor to finish out my mantel. No...this is best of all: IT'S NEVER CROWDED!

3. I received the ultimate consequence for texting and walking the other day. Ok...maybe not ultimate. I didn't fall into a fountain or anything. But pretty dadgum embarrassing. I was in Walmart. And I had to go to the bathroom. But I also had to let the hubs know that I was there and needed to know if he needed me to get anything for him. So...lost in my texting...I looked up and found myself in the men's bathroom!

Crickets.

Horrified, I ran out.

And if you happen to know the guy who watches the surveillance videos in Walmart, please tell him not to send that to America's Dumbest People!

4. I woke up at 3:00 Wednesday morning with a stomach virus that took me down for two days. Yuck! It was not pleasant...for anyone...in our house. I laid still for 2 days...because...well...if I moved...I.tossed.cookies! And I have not been that sick since the year 2000 when I was so sick that I had to be taken to the ER because the nurse on the phone thought I had meningitis. I had two spinal taps done. Turns out I was just really dehydrated and my body sucked in 4 bags through an I.V. rather quickly. Oh...and then later that week, the spinal tap didn't close up and they had to go back in a do an epidural blood patch. Phew!!! I guess things could've been worse this week.

5. My nephew packed up his precious little family and moved them...today...to Louisville, KY. To start seminary. I'm SO excited to watch God's plan unfold in their lives.

When it rains...

I had the exquisite honor and privilege to attend a women's retreat this past weekend. And I don't know what else to say except that I will never be the same.

I've heard story after story where God shows up in people's lives and orchestrates baffling events and situations that changes all kinds of things in the life of that person and sets their feet firmly on a new course. Yes...over and over...in the lives of countless others. And don't get me wrong, the Creator of the universe has nestled me securely in the palm of His hand as well and when I think back on all the things He has spared me from; and all the mercy and grace he's showered over me, I am grateful and humbled. And because of it, I spend a lot of time trying to convince precious friends how much He loves them and has a specific plan for them, and that He has not skipped them when passing out blessings. But I've always failed to believe that truth for myself. I mean I have believed it with my head, but my heart wasn't sold.

It is now.

And I can't explain it except that He orchestrated some baffling and highly personal events just for me last weekend. And now I am convinced...and the words of this song are the only words sufficient enough to explain...and even these words don't seem to be enough...

Free to Be Beautiful

I lived in a world made of tears

Afraid and abandoned contained by my fears

I was hurting and broken alone and believing

The worst about who I could be

But then Your love captured my heart

And you rescued me out of the dark

And I finally see the truth about everything

You see in me

(Chorus)

And I'm free to be beautiful

To spread my wings and to soar on the wind

Free to laugh loud

Free to love strong

Free to fly higher since You came along

And I'm free to be beautiful

You've opened the cage I was keeping me in

And everything's changed because

You made me see that I'm beautifully free

Now you have opened my eyes

I can see all the promise and reach for the skies

Be strong and courageous and smile at tomorrow

And all that I'm destined to be

I know I can dream for the best

You promised I have nothing less

And I am sure that nothing's impossible

When I believe

(Chorus)

I won't give in, I won't back down

I won't surrender or turn back around

I'll fly higher and higher

And dare to believe I can make it because I believe

If you think you've been skipped over by God, try your best to believe that you haven't been. Try your best to believe the things He took the time to spell out carefully and strategically in His Word that you are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14) He desperately wants you to know that He loves you...He has always loved you...He always will love you...He has never not loved you.

He may just be waiting for you to come to Him and empty your hands of whatever you are holding on to.

When it rains...it pours...

Hanging out in the shadows...

It's fitting that it rained today. Our parched, dry ground has needed it much like the parched, dry ground of my soul.

It's been one of those seasons where everything just feels blah to me. Nothing bad has happened. In fact...quite the opposite is true. We have moved into a beautiful house that is the perfect size and has the perfect color scheme that goes perfectly with our furniture. Summer is here and I'm off work. And I'm getting paid to wake up when I want, take little road trips here & there, bask in the sun by the pool, spend as much time as I need with God, meet friends for coffee and/or lunch, operate the remote at my leisure, and get lost in the romance of a chick flick whenever I want. So why the dry spell? Not sure, really. But what I do know is that it's not the first time it's happened, nor is it the last. And...it's not going to last forever. It's just a season. I'm finally learning that it's just part of the journey.

So. I woke up on this Monday morning and reached...first thing...for my iPhone. First to see what time it was. Then to see what God needed to say to me today. I was greeted by the little red 1 waiting patiently for me in the top right corner of my Fighter Verses app. It was letting me know that since today was Monday, it was time to memorize a new verse from God's Word. I'm always anxious to get a new verse because I've come to know that God highly personalizes His messages to me, so I always know that a new verse is meant just for the season or circumstance that I'm in and that I will need it at some point in the near future as part of my armor.

Monday, July 9th - Psalm 91:1-2
He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust."

As a former English teacher, I can't help but take apart the verse to understand what He wants me to know. The verb dwell in the verse is beckoning me to action. I won't stumble into the shelter of the Most High on accident. I must dwell there. And dwell...according to Google...means to live or stay as a permanent resident; reside. Abide. Bunk. Crash. Exist. Hang out. Nest. Occupy. Park. Rest. Settle. Tarry.

Get the picture?

But I'm also moved by the effect of doing so. Will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. Will. Not maybe. Not might. Not every once in a while. Will. If I'm not mistaken, that's a promise. And because I believe with my whole heart that His Word is true, I have to believe that hanging out with the Most High is something I don't want to turn down or miss.

So I will because maybe this dry spell is really just me resting in the shadow of the Almighty.

Anyone want to crash with me There?

Everything I could do NOT to cry...

Ya know...there are just times when a girl needs to cry. A good wailing that gets it all out and cleanses the soul. And boy did I almost have a breakdown on Friday.

First of all...I could not sleep Thursday night. That happens often in the summertime. Mainly because I get to sleep till I wake up, take naps, and lounge to my heart's desire. Sometimes I do all those things in one day in the summer, and by the time bedtime rolls around my eyes don't want to cooperate.

Anyway...my dad worked hard on the entertainment center and the time we got to work on it together over Father's Day weekend was priceless for me. But Friday was the day that I was going to get it. My folks rented a little U-Haul trailer and drove it all the way down to my house. And I was excited.

I cleared the workout room to make room for it while Brad helped my dad take it out of the trailer. They brought it inside and through the living room. From our living room you have to go through a little doorway and through a hallway to get to the bedroom and the workout room. And dang it...my beautiful entertainment center would not fit through the doorway. They tried to turn it every which way they possibly could but it was not going to go through. Unfortunately there were no other corners it would fit in.

So.

My beautiful entertainment center is sitting in the perfect corner of the master bedroom in my sister's house!

It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day!

Father/daughter projects and so forth...

There's not much I can claim to know, but one thing I do is that I will never get too old to work on do-it-yourself projects with my Dad. Definitely.

Way back several years ago when I was single and living in Denver, I purchased a corner-style entertainment center. A lovely piece that I adored before all of the moving fun ensued...which is a story for another time. By the time I made a more permanent move to Dallas, I didn't have a place to put my lovely piece of furniture. So...I deposited in my parents' living room for them to use and enjoy. Lo and behold they moved a couple months ago and would no longer have a place for it. So I said that I wanted it back but that I wanted to paint it black. Now...because of all the pins I see on Pinterest that boast of how easy it is to paint furniture, I had planned to just throw some primer on it and do a bang up job of spray painting it. But when I told my dad that I wanted to paint it, he said that he would help me. He...by the way...is the handiest knight in shining armor that I know. If he doesn't know how to do something, he will find out how, and make it look better than anything I could go and spend a fortune on. So. I jumped on his offer and made my way up last weekend to his house on Father's Day weekend so I could help him paint the durn thing.

And...oh my stars...we had so much fun.

We sanded.

And...OY!...were my arms sore. FYI...sanding is not for the faint of heart!

We washed it down with TSP. I have no idea what that is except that it is a cleaning agent and it takes scuff marks off doors and walls, etc. -and- that you can wash down something that you just sanded. Oh...and you can buy it a Lowes or Home Depot.

We painted it red. (And then let it dry.)

We painted it black. (And then let it dry.)

And then we got some clean white cloths (old t-shirts cut into strips) and dabbed them with some denatured alcohol...which I had never heard of till I was 43...and ran it across small places such as edges and corners, etc. This step removed the black paint and revealed the red underneath making it looked distressed.

Then. We stopped for the weekend. And enjoyed some fun family time with my nephew, Chad, his wife, Jenn, and their precious angel, Anna Grace.

Then...after I went home...my Dad applied a few coats of lacquer. And...voila!

I love the finished project. But I will treasure it all the more because of the memories we made transforming it.

It was the best Father's Day gift I've ever received!!

A little of this and a little of that...

I could never be a house cleaner. A maid, that is, which I haven't heard anyone say in a long time, so it could be that the term is now politically incorrect. Regardless, I was not cut out for that type of work, and I'll tell you why. It hurts, that's why!  Last Thursday, we surrendered our keys to the owner of the house we've lived in for three years, which meant that Wednesday I had to go over and load my car with our remaining possessions and clean it from top to bottom while Brad socialized worked. It took me 3 1/2 hours to clean the whole house and that was without anything in it!  And the next day I felt it...everywhere. By the way...I highly suggest that you never use double-sided tape to secure a rug to any kind of flooring. But if you already have, plan on using some Goo Gone and a lot of scraping when you're ready to take it up. Really! 

So the last week and a half has been one big moving and cleaning adventure...at home and work...and do you know that I'm still not done at home nor at work!  And I SO wish I were because mamaw is tired and sore!  But enough about that.

Unfortunately, I don't think our relationship with our new digital cable/Internet provider is going to work out. Our needs are just not being met, and we've given them a new chance every night for a week and a half and we have yet to watch a full episode of anything without squiggly lines and audio problems. Oh it's fine if we sit real still in one place and refrain from getting on the Internet while the t.v. is on. But if we veer from that, it's all downhill. However, we called them today and had them reset our modem and our cable box.  Now all the people on the HD channels look like robots.  We just can't live this way anymore.  And we certainly cannot watch the Summer Olympics this way, so it's time for this company to pack up and go home. They will not be receiving a rose. And the search continues for a provider who will go the extra mile and deliver the goods. So, I believe that we could be considered spoiled t.v. snobs now.

Hail.  That's what it just finished doing outside for the 4th time in the last week and a half, and that would not be a big deal except that our garage still has boxes in it instead of our cars.  What the hail?!  Haha.

Thank you, Veda...

The good news is that I found a company to service us with digital cable and high-speed internet. The bad news is I know nothing about them and have only heard of them once...last Thursday when I had to ask the Google who in the world would service my tv and Internet in my area. And because I had never heard of them and had no references to go on, I was a little nervous taking the plunge with them. But Friday, my friends rallied around to help me in my quandary, and lo and behold, one of them scrounged up another friend who uses them and she gave me what I needed in order to feel confident with the choice. So I went online and submitted an order for a tv/internet bundle and when Veda, the customer service rep, called me today to set up installation, she was extremely helpful and friendly. That was a good sign to me and since they are a smidge cheaper than Uverse my heart is filled with gladness. It is my hope that I will be able to provide them with a good reference for someone else. It remains to be seen.

In other news, I had to stay home from work on Monday. When I tell you I was sicker than a dog through the night Sunday night, I mean it was not pretty. Not at all. I haven't done what I did that night since 2001, and y'all, I don't want to do that again, well...ever. And I don't want to talk about it anymore because it's a horrible memory.

But my knee is feeling good. Since the half marathon that I started but did not finish back in March, I have been resting it, icing it, squatting and lunging to strengthen the muscles around it, and continuing with some cardio workouts. And it is working. It's sill not 100% because I still feel it a little when I run, but it does not throb, lock up, or hurt afterward. And that also fills me with gladness. I am looking forward to revving up for another half marathon in the next year or so.

And on that note, I will shut it down. If I don't get some sleep this week I will not be a good move supervisor on Friday. And we all know the move can't happen without the supervisor!

Cookies and the internet...

I'm drowning in piles of stuff and things and boxes, and I'm overwhelmed (and a bit ashamed) of the excess we've accumulated since we moved in three years ago. I mean really...how many dead batteries does one couple need? And why...WHY...do I feel the need to stockpile contact lens cases? I just can't bring myself to throwing a new case that's never been used in the trash can. It's like throwing out perfectly good food. I guess. Or maybe the thinking that's happening inside my head when I open a new bottle of saline solution and a contact case falls out is that there may come a day when I actually need that many cases. Or someone might come over and they will need a contact case and, being the greatest hostess around, I will have one for them. I suppose it is also possible that I have my teacher friends in mind when I'm doing the stockpiling because we all know that teachers are the most resourceful group of people on the planet and if anyone could repurpose a contact case it would be a teacher. Or some of you wild DIYers that I see on Pinterest. Who knows? All I know is that I have a sickness over contact cases and a drawer full of them I don't know what to do with.

So anyway.

I'm way behind on getting my excess packed into boxes, and that is starting to stress me out because we are moving next Friday. When I get stressed out, I become overwhelmed, and when I get overwhelmed, I'm paralyzed. And being paralyzed stresses me out. It's like when you give a mouse a cookie!

But I suppose it will get done next Thursday night.

Which brings me to the next point. The neighborhood we're moving to does not get service for Uverse. Or Time Warner. Or Comcast. What? Hello...we're not moving to the boonies! Oh...and it doesn't have a neighborhood pool! Dang!! This is stressing me out because who am I going to get to provide my Internet and tv habit and WHERE am I going to lay out? The mall may be getting a new friend this summer. This is not good. Oh I just really don't need anymore moving stress because...well...there's just not time for the chain of events that occurs when I get stressed.

But the good news is that there is only 9 more days of school. Happy Friday to all of us!

TNL junkie no more...

I'm in mourning tonight. I might have to rip my clothes and wail in the streets because I think my love affair with toffee nut lattes and chocolate chip cookies is over. And now I'm wondering if I'm going to have to become a full-on card carrying member of the vegetarian team. Because...you see...it's midnight forty-one and I'm still awake. Just like I was a few short nights ago. Blah! And I might just be getting to the age in life where rest is more appealing than melt-in-your-mouth cookies.

However, you'll be happy to know that I prayed for you. Yes...you...the one reading this post. I hope you get that miracle you've been wanting.

But anyway. Since my taste buds have changed...against my will, mind you...I have been searching Pinterest for healthy recipes. And easy ones, too, because no one wants to stay in the kitchen too long after working all day and blogging all night.

So I found one today that makes me want to sing. The two people in my house licked the bowl clean on this one. It was not linked to a blog and there was no name for it, so I will call it the salad that makes you want to sing.

Fresh spinach
Cucumber
Avocado
Cherry tomatoes halved
Black beans
Cilantro
Evoo
Red wine vinegar
S & P

Go on. Give it a try.

The finish line...

Last night Brad and I crossed the proverbial finish line of the Daniel fast, and at times, I did feel as if I was running a marathon. We celebrated with our friends, who also did the fast, by throwing down some tex-mex at Anamias. And oh sweet heavens, it was the most delightful evening, maybe...of my entire life! OH MY WORD, it was SO good. I would share what we ate, but I scarfed it down so quickly that it's blurry as to what was actually on my plate.

When we started the fast, we weren't really aiming for a bunch of weight loss, although we knew that we would drop some poundage along the way. We really just wanted to detox from all the junk that our bodies have grown accustomed to needing and craving. But there are also extra things to learn and principles to be gleaned from something like this, and thankfully, I have some good take aways and changes I will try to make.

1. It's not the caffeine in coffee that I'm addicted to. It's the taste and aroma in the mornings that float my boat. The first day of the fast, I was draggy and lethargic, but I was fine after that. Decaffeinated coffee might just do the trick from here on out.

2. There are some delicious meals out there made of only vegetables! I know...I was shocked too! But it's true. And...we have decided to continue with a few days a week eating fruits and vegetables only.

3. Eating healthy had a positive impact on my rest. I was shocked at how well I slept every.single.night!! And now, after my tex-mex and sugar rendezvous, here I am...awake at 3:16 a.m. for the first time in 3 weeks!! Sound sleep was a definite plus and will be a factor in what I eat from now on!

4. I was never hungry. Not once. Ok...well maybe once or twice when I wasn't prepared and couldn't find a quick fix for the hunger pains! But anyway. Yes, I was faced with the truth that my bad eating habits are more of a mental and emotional issue than anything else. Which shouldn't surprise me because don't most bad habits stem from mental and emotional issues!

5. Spiritually. There were some ugly truths I knew about myself already, but they were resting peacefully in the shadows of my busy, hectic, eat on the go lifestyle. My natural bent toward rebellion is quite monstrous. If I can't have it, aye-yi-yi, I want it so much more. Now...because I'm a rule follower and a people pleaser, the rebellion is manifested in whining and complaining. Lord have mercy, I was a big grump for 3 weeks. It's the newest issue that needs to be tended to. And...it's no coincidence that the messages surrounding me lately are about submitting to God and being intentional. I will not be spiritually, mentally, emotionally, or physically fit by accident. That's a no brainer for some, but apparently I'm a hands on learner!

6. Sugar. It is bad! It is why I'm blogging at...now 5:22 in the morning...and not sleeping soundly!

If you were anywhere near me over the last 21 days, you are probably so happy that it is over because now you won't have to listen to me pour over all I can't have and all I wish I could. But I will do this again...and yes, I will start pressuring you to do it with me. If not for the detox and feeling better, then do it to go down a size in jeans like I did or lose 13 pounds like my boy, Brad, did! And...in 3 short weeks!

Vegetables...I bow to you. I have judged and condemned you unfairly, and you are not as bad as I once thought.

3, 2, 1...

That's right...3 days...yes...only 3 days left on my Daniel Fast. Without getting into too much detail, I only cheated a couple times, and just so you know, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. And if you don't believe me, then I challenge you to the Daniel Fast for 21 days. Then...we'll talk!

This week has been positively gnarly and I don't mean in a good way...and it started its descent on Tuesday. Tuesday. Well...it kicked my hiney. After sitting in a tiny office, that I'm sure sat at 50 degrees, watching a student take a test from 8:15 till 2:30, I went home and worked all evening troubleshooting something that didn't want to be troubleshot. I finally surrendered and closed my computer at 9:48 to put an end to the day. And certain that no day could be worse than Tuesday, I launched into Wednesday and Thursday just to find how very wrong I can be. I seriously feel I've been the main character in an episode of Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. Except it's been a week.

But back to the fast. I did manage to make a really really delicious Italian soup this week that Brad declared needed to be in our meal rotation from now on. And it was easy.

Purée a tomato (or two) and put it in a pan. Turn the heat to medium-high and add a tablespoon (or two) of olive oil, a clove of garlic and 1/4 cup of chopped onion. Sauté for a few minutes. Add some artichokes, mushrooms, zucchini, and any other vegetable you want. Stir in half a box of vegetable stock and as much Italian seasoning as you want. Simmer for about 30 minutes.

I served mine with toasted whole wheat flat bread with a tiny bit of vegan butter and garlic powder. It added a delicious finishing touch to the soup.

I'm sure glad it's Friday. This episode needs to end.

What it looks like...

Today I was moved...and humbled...to tears.

I've been captivated lately by people who exude genuine selflessness. I think because I've just been surrounded...for a while now...with this theme. At every turn. So, naturally, I feel like there's good reason for it, and that there must be something in there I need to learn and implement in this regard.

But anyway. Today.

I sat and listened to a friend tell me about how her life is getting ready to change. Dramatically. She has two children. One is grown and is heading down the aisle soon to meet his bride. The other one has one year of high school left and is sitting at the top of her class and excels in pretty much everything she attempts. My friend's life is good. She's happy and content, and has a seemingly easy and low maintenance life. Right now.

I also listened as she told me about these 4 other children whose life is not good. Not happy. And nowhere near low maintenance. And it never has been. In their young lives they have endured and persevered through more than my mind can even fathom; the things their innocent eyes have seen is more than my heart can bear. When I think of how I...as an adult...long, so often, to feel protected, loved, and cared for; for hope when I'm in a rough season; to be filled when I'm empty...it's almost too much to take to imagine what they feel...daily.

But because of compassion. And kindness. And gentleness. And mercy. My friend and her husband are doing the only thing there is to do. They are offering hope to these kids and starting their parenting days...all over. They are filling out endless paperwork and preparing in countless ways for a multitude of children to join their family. They are holding out their arms and offering a new normal to kids who have been stripped of innocence.

In my Bible study tonight, the author asked, "what does being full of mercy look like for you?" She asked it of herself in her own quiet time, and then asked it of those who are doing the study. And I had to think about it in my own life. Humbly, I have to confess...so often there's so much of me, my and mine that I miss opportunities left and right to show mercy. Or I recognize opportunities, but put them off for later. A lot of the time...later never comes. Sigh.

Mercy.

I want to know it. Do it. Serve it up on silver platters.

My friend knows what mercy looks like in her world.

Pinterest, don't let me down...

House-hunting is for the birds. Yes. It is. Over the last three days I have walked in and around 13 houses, and I'm happy to report that they have all run together and I have no idea which is which. Except that I took notes and I may be able to differentiate with those. Maybe. But I definitely remember the ones I might have nightmares about, and for that...I'm not so excited. I'm fairly certain that one of them may have been the location of a murder. And if it wasn't...well...then I don't really have any need or desire to know what went on in that house. I didn't take notes on that one because, unfortunately the visual notes are planted in my memory till the day I die.

So.

Vegetables.

I tried my hand at the veggie burgers the other night, and they wouldn't stick together. I spent 2 hours in the kitchen chopping, grating, slicing, peeling, and mashing just to end up with veggie mush. I did have a helper though who I will not name. But he who shall not be named hurt his back, cut his finger, and bled all over the potatoes. Cooking is not for the faint of heart!

I used to love to cook and...well...I'm not really enjoying the cooking now. And because of all the hard work I've poured into the preparing of the meals over the last week where all but two of them resulted in yuckness...I'm a little hesitant to get back in the cooking saddle. So tonight I had an apple for dinner and Brad was left to fin for himself. He had roasted potatoes and a salad with salsa dressing. It was a cooking experience for him that was not as hazardous as his last endeavor.
And that made everyone's dinner experience more pleasant.

But the apple hasn't carried me too far.
So I'm headed over to Pinterest to see if I can find a recipe for the most delicious vegetable brownie you'll ever eat!

Oh the drama...

Rules. I'm so tired of rules yet I'm bound by them. Overwhelmed, yet in desperate need of them. Love and Loathe them. Energized and paralyzed by them. Strangled by and free from them. I don't want them but I SO do. I'm frustrated by those who don't follow rules, yet I long to be like them. And in my attempt to be free from rules, I run right back to them and tether myself to the place where the carrot dangles in my face. Although...I can't seem to get a clear view of what the carrot is or what it promises me once I capture it.

In my quest to understand this battle and this heart and soul God handpicked and strategically placed in me, I so get it one day, and the next day...baffled by the feeling that I'm lost and wandering without a purpose. As my favorite author has said, "no one frustrates me more than me." And that...I get!

My life is currently enveloped in rules and laws, and this is why I'm in such a quandary. I'm in the throws of a bible study in the book of James. If you are familiar with that book of the Bible, then you know that he can stir up some questions and rock your hermeneutics world before you know what's hit you. And for someone who grew up under a doctrine with lots of rules, it should be black and white. But it's not, and I'm being challenged beyond my level of comfort.

The weight of rules doesn't end there.

I'm also in the throws of a 21-day fast. The Daniel Fast. And there's really just one main rule...eat fruits and vegetables...only...and drink water...only...for 21 days. 21 days! That isn't a big deal, right? Right. I mean...I have endured way more difficult circumstances for way longer than that. And I lived; all was well, and the result was much growth.

So I realized yesterday, amidst all the drama going on inside my head, that the two things that should be refining and cleansing me are instead winding me up tighter than the bunny that just keeps going and going and going. I'm in awe at my husband's diligence and self-control while he downs the vegetables meal after meal AND doesn't.complain.at.all!! I'm in awe of the ease at which he delights in bland smoothies morning after morning and his steadfast commitment to see this thing through not once entertaining the thought of...ahem...quitting. It could be that these are a few of the traits in him that propelled him to the top of our high school graduating class and me...well...not at the top of our graduating class! It could be that this...this...is the trait in me that's needing to be tended to. A trait that factored in to God's decision to make Brad my husband. (Because I have learned that He will use our spouse when needed as a mirror to reflect changes that need to be made in us)!

Dang! So the thing about rules and laws is that they just show me how not together I truly am. And what I have discovered in the writing of this blog post is that in both of my 'thorns' I have made me the priority, and that I'm so distracted by the rules and what I'm being deprived of that there's no room for the refining and cleansing to take place.

And...

I have a choice in it all. I can close the book of James with the declaration that it's just too hard and I'm never going to understand it and move on to a feel-good study; and I can take this 21-day fast and place it on the shelf and drown my sorrow of defeat in a toffee nut latte...

or...

I can get up and take my self out of the equation. Embrace the opportunity I have before me to 'do it differently this time'. And look forward to the day when I will be refined and cleansed with the credentials to encourage others who, at some point, will need to persevere. I mean...His blessings on us are meant to be shared and not kept to ourselves. Right?

Friends...this is who I am without Him...a whiny, drama-y, spoiled, and unmotivated quitter. If I get through these things, it will absolutely be by the power of Christ that lives in me...and nothing...I mean...nothing...to do with me.

Oh...and just so you know...if I happen to engage you in a conversation about how hard I have it right now, just know it is a ploy to get permission to quit. Don't be deceived into feeling sorry for me. I have abundantly more than I need!!

Amen.

My vegan days are numbered...

Oh my heavens...I felt great today. I wasn't hungry. I wasn't sleepy. I wasn't grumpy. And I didn't get a visit from the seven dwarves in case you're wondering. Oh...and I didn't oversleep. And then I came home. After I did my yoga, I felt really good and relaxed and then I hit a dadgum wall. Passed out on the couch. And woke up with my mouth wide open. I don't think I'm cut out for the vegan lifestyle.

Anyway...I have learned in the last three days how to be creative with food because really...I wasn't lying about the strawberries and celery...and I like strawberries and celery...not together of course....and I don't want to get burned out on them.

So.

I made veggie-stuffed peppers. And yum. They were quite tasty. Here's what I did.

Puréed a tomato. Put it in a pan. Added some olive oil and a little salt. Some garlic. Some Italian seasoning. And some lemon juice. Then I added vegetables - artichokes - zucchini - mushrooms - red bell pepper - and that's all because I was so hungry that first night I couldn't bring myself to chop another vegetable. Oh and some pinto beans. I let it simmer a while and then filled some orange bell peppers, poured a little tomato sauce on top and cooked for 30 minutes on 350.

Delish.

Day two of twenty-one...

Please pray for me. And for Brad. Yes...please pray for both of us.

I am on day 2 of the 21-day Daniel Fast. And I'm not gonna lie...I might just throw up if see another strawberry or celery stick lie down on my plate. And it's only day 2, y'all. DAY 2!! I can't have caffeine and I can't have meat and I can't have dairy and I can't have...ummm...c.h.o.c.o.l.a.t.e. And...OH MY WORD...that makes me want it so! It also makes for very rough mornings, which have never been easy or my best time of day, but now I'm dragging by the time I darken the doors at work. Yesterday, day 1, was harsh. I was sleepy all day, and after I finished dinner, I collapsed on the couch at 7, woke up and went to bed at 9:30, slept all night and didn't hear my alarm...at all! I just happened to wake up on my own to find that it was 6:15 and my alarm had been going off for an hour! Fortunately, I managed to make it to work on time...but it wasn't my best hair day.

I wonder if Daniel felt this way after a day or two of his fast or if he ever wanted to cry 'uncle' and run back and tell the King that he changed his mind and definitely wanted to eat at his table and enjoy all the fine foods he was being offered. I'm guessing he did, but I'm pretty sure that when he felt that way, he bent his knee in prayer. I mean...at the end of his training King Neb found no other trainee equal to him and his 3 sidekicks. So I'm sure if he'd had a blog, he wouldn't have spent his time complaining about what he couldn't have or how hungry he was. It's likely he would have listed his undeserved blessings he was receiving.

So...I will also stop complaining, and I will try not to dwell on the fact that my stomach is almost concave...ok, maybe concave is not the right word...and my arm is looking like one tasty piece of meat. Instead I will also dwell on my daily blessings and His new mercies as well as other things on my plate. (Get it...my plate!) Which brings me to my next point...

We have to move.

Yes...move. As in out of our house and into another one. And...ick...I can't stand moving. You see, our lease is up, and well...our landlords want their place back. Of course, things like this never present themselves at a convenient time, and this is no exception. We were hoping to stay here one more year so we could be in a better place next year to purchase. But God has a different plan, and I'm more than confident that it is way better than anything I could come up with on my own. It's just not clear yet.

So...

While you are praying for us to make it out of the 21-day Daniel Fast with all limbs intact, please also mention that we need a new place to reside.

Thanks. And enjoy your pizza.

The cloud is making me lazy...

That is a sentence I never have imagined to come out of my mouth. But seriously...the cloud is making me lazy. Well...it's possible that I owned a few lazy character traits before the cloud came around, but the cloud is really not helping.

I woke up early this morning. 6:36 a.m. Unlike most mornings, though, I felt rested and ready to wake up. The first thing I wanted to do was to not get up, but lay in my warm bed and read my book that I purchased last week. It was Sunday and I had 3 hours before I had to get ready for church and the setup was perfect for some quiet reading time. And...it's one of those books I can't put down, and I love it when I find a book that captures my attention like that. I rubbed my eyes, stretched a little, and reached for my iPhone. I opened the book and started reading on the page that was bookmarked. After a paragraph or two, I realized that the text was familiar and I had already read it. And then I realized that yesterday when I read, I did so on my iPad. When I purchased the book, I downloaded it on my iPhone. And my iPad. And my iTouch. And OH MY WORD, I was going to have to get out of bed, go downstairs, and figure out where I stopped reading yesterday on my iPad. To add to my frustration, the page numbers are not the same on the iPad as they are on the iPhone. My quiet reading time...all the sudden...was not a relaxing venture, and I...was annoyed beyond measure!

But I did it. I got up and stomped downstairs and figured I should make some coffee and treat myself while I was down there for all the trouble I had to go through to find where I left off in my book. I mean...really...can't these people who create the smart phones be smart enough to make all my devices tell each other where my bookmark should be so that when I reach for one, I won't have to be put out and take 5 minutes out of my time to find the dang bookmark!

And then it hit me just how spoiled I am and we are in our society today. When my phone apps don't sync fast enough to the online version; or the internet icons just spin and spin and make me wait 15 seconds instead of 3 seconds to get to the dang website; or the device I just invested in last month is now a dinosaur and doesn't work with the latest software version...I am irritated to no end and taking my business elsewhere! I also thought about how it wasn't that long ago (just 20ish years or so) where my phone was hooked to my kitchen wall with a long plastic coiled cord and talking in privacy was not a thought that crossed my mind. And the book I was reading had a hard cover with colorful pictures on the front and was sitting on the kitchen table. The message I wanted to send my friend was written on notebook paper and folded neatly with a flap on the front and her name written in my handwriting and signed LYLAS! And I couldn't hear back from her till after 1st or 2nd period. And it was all good.

So I'm baffled by the fact that something that is supposed to make my life easier and more efficient and mobile is creating more work, more frustration, and more annoyance than any contraption I've ever owned. Yet, I find so often that I'm a slave to it!

Sometimes I wish we could just go back to the 80s, where we spent most of our time making our bangs stand tall and proud.

Disappointed but not defeated

Today is March 25th and that means that it was the big day. The big day I thought enough of to put a countdown timer at the top of my blog. The day my running buddies and I have anticipated and looked forward to since December.

At the sound of the gun, our corral inched forward and crossed the starting line at 8:12. The butterflies had finally subsided and our race was underway. It was a gorgeous morning. Not a cloud in the sky. My first half marathon with an offering of good weather.

Shortly after I crossed the 2 mile mark I began to feel my knee...the one that started hurting about 3 weeks ago. The further I ran the more I felt it and by the 5k split, it was throbbing and locking up. I slowed to a walk but I WASN'T going to stop! I even had an invitation to ride on my friend's back and piggy back the 2012 Rock & Roll Half Marathon! Right after mile 4, I spotted a medic station and pulled over and took a seat. I thought maybe I could ice it or they could re-apply my KT tape or they might be able to give me some kind of tip to try to finish out the race successfully. Nope! Instead he told me, "You can't continue. This is only mile 4 and it would be very unwise to run any further with your knee in this shape." I cried.

And cried.

And cried some more.

But my will gave in and listened to what my body was saying to me. I walked to the ambulance, had them put an ice pack on it and walked to the next corner where my husband picked me up. And the tears wouldn't stop. I'm not sure when I've ever been so disappointed. Ever.

But as I sit here on my couch with ice piled on my knee, I'm thankful that cooler heads prevailed and I didn't choose to injure it more because of pride. I'm thankful that I have a wonderful husband who knew the minute he heard my voice that something was wrong and couldn't get to me fast enough. I'm thankful that once he got to me he just wrapped his arms around me and let me cry all over him. That I got to be at the finish line to see my friends cross it. That I have the kind of friends who would offer to carry me on their back and cry with me over my disappointment and send me verses from the Bible to keep me encouraged. I am truly blessed. I will get up off the ground, shake off the dust, and look forward to healing for the next race. I am disappointed but not defeated.

It's random today...

So the rest of my day on Monday continued with the theme it started with and instead of just delaying the doing of the tasks on my list, I completely ignored it. After I sat on the patio in the sun at Starbucks for 3 hours, I went over to my friend, Nancy's house and we laid out by her pool for the rest of the afternoon. It was a glorious day of vitamin D.

Then...on Monday evening I took in the last episode of The Bachelor...and wowzers...does he ever look like his mama! But I just want to say that I think he needs a new do. Some can pull off the messy look and make messy look quite appealing to the rest of us. I do not believe Ben is one of these people. And maybe all he needs is to change where he parts it because down the middle makes him look like Alfalfa. But then again...look how I used to fix my hair...so what do I know!

Like my glasses? I wanted some bigger ones, but those were all I could afford!

And then...well...his choice leaves me not knowing what to say except that, like all of us, there must be a battle on the inside of that little model. For out of the heart, the mouth speaks...and spews all over 24 other girls who come near. But I was not put here to judge because the good Lord knows that I have been known to have some times where I spewed some yuck on others! I wish only happiness and healthy growth for them.

I laced up my new running shoes yesterday morning and ran 3.5 miles with my good friend, Jill. Y'all...the mosquitoes were everywhere and am sure because of the warm winter we had they will be everywhere from here on out. I think I might stock up on some Off now! And...and...blisters on the back of my foot. Ick! I am hoping I can get those shoes broken in before next Sunday!! Which means I might should put them on several more times and actually run. But it really gets in the way of my laying around doing nothing and enjoying spring break time.

Oh...and I was also elated to hear from AFAA saying they were pleased to inform me that I successfully completed and passed both the practical and written portions of the Primary Group Instructor Certification exams. Now this is exciting because at some point I will get some type of exercise group off the ground and take the choice back out of my working out. People will be there waiting on me to give them a good workout and when that is the case I am on it! However, I guess I better stop writing posts about how I plan to work out but then something more fun comes up and I choose that instead of exercising because then nobody will be interested in paying me to give them a good workout!!

And finally...the last random thing on my mind...spaghetti squash!!! Dang! Does anyone have any tips for cutting those things in half without butchering your hand and fingers? There is a price to pay for eating healthy and I don't just mean hunger pains! I found this recipe on Pinterest that looked really healthy and yummy. So I decided to give it a go.

Here is what it was supposed to look like:



And here is what it actually looked like:



And the Whataburger Jr. with cheese that I actually ate for dinner was divine!

Behind my eyes...

Today is the first day of Spring Break and I couldn't be happier about it. The sun is shining brightly and my weather app is promising me a high of 81 degrees. A little taste of summer has welcomed me to my day (although with a high of 81 it's more like a little taste of a summer day in North Dakota or Seattle or somewhere way north of these parts!)

I have a whole list of things I want to do this week like clean out closets and drawers, getting rid of a bunch of unnecessary excess, and of course do some spring cleaning because really...there is good reason we have not invited friends over since Christmas! I also really really really need to run since I have a half marathon coming up in less than 2 weeks. So my plan for today was to get up and do my bible study, run 9 miles, come home and finish the leftover laundry, vacuum and mop the floors, organize at least one of the junk drawers, and prepare a fabulous and healthy meal for my dude.

And here's how it has played out so far...

I woke up at 7:46 and what was behind my eyes before they opened was the fact that every single morning when my alarm signals me at 5:30 that it's time to get ready for work, I wish...every single morning...that I could just lay in my warm bed till I decide I want to get up. And then have coffee till whenever I want to stop drinking coffee.

So...I opened my Francine Rivers book and read for an hour. And then the nurse at my doctor's office called with not one piece of not so great news, but two. So I worried a little bit and talked to two beautiful people who encouraged me to stay faithful to trust in God and not worry anymore because, truthfully, worry gets you nowhere. It just takes up time and space in your heart, soul, and mind that could be better filled with Grace and peace. So I stopped worrying, made some coffee and cinnamon toast, got back in my warm bed and turned on the t.v. Now the chicks from The View are entertaining me...and I'm still drinking coffee! Some might call that lazy...but maybe they don't know what it's like to work in education.

Spring Break is a wonderful gift of time...time that once it's gone, I won't ever get back. So, while there are things that need to be done, getting them done this morning will not make life any richer. Enjoying the gift and the 81 degree day will.

You enjoy your 81 degree day...or whatever degree you are in today!

I need a ukelele...

At 5:30 this morning, my eyes made an unfortunate decision and opened wide without my prior approval. I laid still and quiet for 30 more minutes to try to trick my eyes into going back to sleep but they would not have it, so I threw the covers back and placed my feet firmly on the floor and started my day.

I came downstairs and parked myself on the couch and turned on the t.v. Delighted to see that I Love Lucy was on, I quickly selected that channel. I have always had a particular fondness for Lucy Ricardo and if I had had the chance to know her and she were real, I'm sure we would have been friends.

Anyway...the episode that was airing was one I had never seen. And I was surprised by that because prior to this morning I thought I had seen every single episode of I Love Lucy since I have watched it for at least 35 years. Alas...I had not.

In this particular episode, Little Ricky was supposed to play his drums in front of an audience when out of nowhere he was overcome with stage fright. He thereby declared that he was done playing the drums. Well...that of course concerned Ricky and Lucy because they knew that giving in to this fear could affect him negatively in the long run and could bleed into other more detrimental fears. And we all know that when Lucy encounters a conflict she thinks of a plan! And she did not disappoint in this episode. She went to great lengths to help him to overcome his fear. She tried to reason with him and bribe him and eventually Big Ricky used a wonderful analogy with him and talked him into playing in his night club. And of course in any good sitcom, there has to be some kind of wrench thrown in the plan especially when there's still 10 minutes left. And this happened when the manager of the night club came in and freaked out in front of little Ricky because the ukulele player bailed on them. And little Ricky declared once more, "I'm not playing the drums without the ukulele player!". Lucy promised him that there would be a ukulele player when he got on stage. And it just so happened that after he walked out the door, she turned around and there was a ukelele sitting right there along with a costume for the band! Her long eyelashes batted and the wheels began to turn. And when little Ricky took the stage there sat Lucy dressed up in a little boy's band uniform playing the ukulele right next to him. And...he played the drums like he never had...thus putting that dadgum fear to rest.

I couldn't help but think of our heavenly Father in this little story who does the same thing for us that Lucy did and that any good parent would do for their child...whatever it takes to help us overcome our fear. And to start, He sent His Son to die on a cross for us so that we can live on this earth free from fear and anything else that keeps us in bondage. He promises us blessing when we trust and believe that His precepts are in place for our good, not to harm us or take away our fun. I believe with my whole heart, soul, and mind that He desires for us to take Him at His word so that when we do, we can turn around and just so happens that we have what we need at our fingertips. He can then sit right next to us and watch us play the drums like we never have!

Things that are awesome...

I was reading my friend's blog the other day...going back through some of the entries of late that I missed for one reason or another. I came across an entry she posted not long ago that I luh-uvvved! So...I stole the idea and title from her. But...I'm giving her credit...and by her I mean my beautiful friend Tina...who by the way is a published author and my writing idol. She's fabulous at the craft and you should go and visit her blog if you know what's good for you!

So anyway. Things that are awesome.

1. Thin Mints and Tagalongs. I have a love-hate relationship with them, and it might be borderline co-dependent. But I can totally handle it, and it is awesome.

2. Sore muscles from working out. Is anyone else weird out there and like this feeling?

3. New pens. Even though I write mostly from a keyboard these days and have totally lost any penmanship skills I once had, I still get a charge out of buying new pens.

4. My new app - Fighter Verses. If you are trying to implement the practice of scripture memory into your life, I highly recommend this app. It is more than awesome!

5. Running. From the time Coach Benny Jones made us run every day in P.E. my freshman year of high school to June 2010, I l.o.a.t.h.e.d running. No...more than loathed. And then the C25K app changed my view point and my life. Well...it was one of the catalysts for the change. And now I love it.

6. Today is March 1st. And that means spring. And spring means spring break. And spring break means the end is in sight. And the end being in sight means that I just might make it through my 21st year of my career. And that, y'all, is awesome!

Where the heart is...

There are a handful of times in your life when the opportunity comes along to reminisce for more than a few minutes. And even fewer opportunities to actually put your hands on items from your past that not only jog your memory but stir up emotions making the memory so vivid you can recall the simplest of details. I had the opportunity this past weekend to do just that. And I was privileged to do so with a handful of people I love dearly. My family.

My Dad and Mom moved from the house they've lived in for 11 years to a new house about 20 minutes from where they were. They have spent the last two weeks moving little things over bit by bit, but this weekend it was time to move the big things, so several of us gathered together to get them moved. And not only did that give us the chance to be together, but it gave us a whole weekend to pull things out of boxes from the past and take stroll back in time.

One of things we came across were these Childcraft Encyclopedias. Oh my...I can still see them sitting on the book shelf above the desk in the home I grew up in. I think I scribbled in a few. Did anyone else have these?



Another treasure I came across was an old sewing book, but what was inside was even better...my sister's Christmas wish list from who even knows when. Not better because of the list or the paper or her writing. But because I could see that girl in my mind. Her mannerisms. Her face. Her hair. Her room. The whole package. My big sister. I think she wanted some clothes that year!


I also found my Grandpa's vacation journal from the trip he and my Memaw took to the Holy Land. As we read some of the entries, I could totally hear my Grandpa's voice, and that was priceless!

And then there were a million other little things that brought back so many memories. This is my sister-in-law arranging all the little 'pretties' that my Grandma used to have in her little cabinet that now is displayed in my Mom and Dad's new house.



And then...there are new things that melted my heart just as much. Here is my great niece, Anna Grace, crawling and waving for the first time. What a treasure!



Although my folks have a new place to live, wherever they reside is where my heart will always be.

Home. Familiarity. Treasure. Connection. Family. Food for the soul.