January 12

Today was a wonderful day. A day that I get to participate in a celebration every year. A birthday celebration that is. A celebration of an individual who rocks my world and has done so since I was in third grade. I expect that he will continue that even in to old age. It's my husband, Brad, who celebrated another birthday today. He is now my same age and that...well...that makes me do the happy dance. (I haven't heard that phrase in a while. Is it out of style? If so...I think we should bring it back!)

But anyway...we got to celebrate. Celebrate. We enjoyed some delectable food, munched on engaging conversation, and gave it all up for some - oh my heavens - tiramisu. And I don't even like tiramisu. But y'all...this stuff was worth some words! And while that was wonderful it is not the kind of celebrating I'm referring to. What I'm talking about is the kind of celebration that sparks a flame deep down in your soul that you can't quite put your finger on. It's some kind of feeling that goes so deep you might actually explode, but there are no words you can find that adequately express it. And it wasn't just me. The birthday boy experienced it too.

Feelings like that don't happen very often. And I'm guessing that as more time passes in our marriage the more often that will happen. Who knows. We're still newlyweds. But I'm also guessing it doesn't just happen. It's something that takes work. And some grueling work we have definitely done. And tonight was pay day.

He's someone who makes me want to be a better person, and I'm grateful that I get to journey this life with him. Happiest birthday, B!

Calling Matt M

I'm not even joking when I say that I'm already bored with this season of The Bachelor. I don't watch much tv in the first place, but I do allow myself to indulge in a few goofy prime timers like American Idol, Celebrity Apprentice, The Bachelor, and...well...I'm pretty sure that's it. Most of my friends talk about all the shows they watch religiously and I try to sit down and watch stuff so that I can contribute to conversations about tv watching but my ADD gets the best of me and I return to my digital addictions like Pinterest and Facebook and Words with Friends and Hanging with Friends. But anyway - now I've only watched two episodes of Ben and the girls and I slept through one of them. They have one more chance to keep my attention and if they fail, I will be done with them. That is until the Final Rose and After The Final Rose.

B's iphone was terribly out of style and he desperately needed an upgrade. I mean he was still sporting the iPhone 3. You know...the one that doesn't have a video camera or work with the newest software and runs at a snail's pace. Yes...that's the one. So he upgraded today to the iPhone 4S...the one with Siri. And here's how his first encounter with her went down...

B: remind me to call Deanna tomorrow.
S: Calling Matt M.
B: what will the weather be like tomorrow?
S: Calling Matt M.
B: will I need an umbrella tomorrow?
S: Calling Manni Y.

Siri, you are expensive and you stink!

In other news...the training is going well and my training sisters and I have decided to run the Hot Chocolate Run in February. It's a 15k. Eeeek! We get a sweet jacket though! Take a looksie if you want.

Have a happy Wednesday!

They had no example

The most peculiar thing happened to me today, and I gotta say, I don't know what to say. After work, my training schedule said I was supposed to run 3 miles and then do some strength training. But that didn't sound like very much fun and I didn't want to...and...because I'm a slacker . I could go into all manner of reasons why my not working out is justified because I've worked out and run every other day this week and I'm doing a long run on Saturday with my training chicas, but I don't really want to get into that because I might get sidetracked. Anyway. So, I came home, changed out of my work clothes into something way more comfortable than those dang shoes I wore today that I swore last time I'd never wear again, got in my car and drove to Target. I walked around for thirty minutes searching high and low for something I wanted and/or needed, and y'all, I left empty-handed. I found nothing. Nothing. I'm not sure what is up because that is the first time that has ever happened in the history of me. I must be going through a mid-life crisis. That is all I can think of. And if this is the extent of it, my husband will be elated.

But. That is not the reason I'm posting today.

Because of the implications of a new year being a fresh start and what not I decided to start a new bible study. I mean...what better way to kick off a new year, right? So, I purchased Beth Moore's newest study - James: Mercy Triumphs. It's so good. SO good. As all of hers are. Her daughter, Melissa, helped her with this study and has written many articles about James, the Lord's brother, that delves deeper into the study.

But yesterday after I finished my homework, I read the article that followed the lesson where she discusses a chapter in Acts, which is the topic for the next lesson. For hundreds of years, the Israelites had God right there telling them what to do and where to go and how to live in order to take possession of the land in Caanan that He had promised to them. He laid out very plainly for them the laws for living that they must follow in order to be cleansed and forgiven. It's what they knew. It's who they were. And the laws. Oh the laws. And customs. Well that's what they came to depend on for guidance. And then after the death of Jesus Christ, they had no example. The Gentiles were now also graced with the gift of the Spirit, and the early church was trying to figure out the specifics of uniting as the body of Christ. Figuring out what holy living would look like for everyone was the task at hand. Melissa writes, "Suddenly the early church was experiencing something unprecedented in salvation history. They had no example to follow." She goes on to say that "instead, they had to walk in the Spirit and improvise as they encountered new problems and conflicts." It was a new way of living for them and, I'm guessing, difficult to grasp.

I imagine that they felt much like I do some days. As someone who grew up in church and learned Bible stories and verses and knows the golden rule, I often feel like I should know what to do when messy circumstances or conflicts arise in my life. So often I feel that as a Christian I should just be able to do the right thing and say the right thing and that the fruits of the Spirit should be obvious to all who cross my path. That living by faith should come natural and easy. But that isn't the case because I'm human. And flawed. As the pillars of the early church were. I'm fairly certain that there were times when Peter and Paul and James and all those guys stared in the face of a sticky situation and just wished that God would just tell them what to do. But their purpose was much bigger than those moments and they knew it. My task at hand is much the same as theirs was...to walk in the Spirit and improvise as I encounter new problems and conflicts...moment by moment...one day at a time. If I knew what to do and where to go and what to say and how to handle all my situations, I wouldn't need Him.

And y'all...I can live without the stuff from Target. But He is just something I can't live without.

Another Countdown

I really can't believe I am just now posting about THIS topic. I mean...really. I guess I've just been consumed with the holiday festivities like decorating and parties and shopping and cooking and baking and family time and gift giving and undecorating and Pinterest and Facebook and complaining that our school district made us work on a NATIONAL HOLIDAY that our upcoming trip to Maui just slipped right out of my blonde little head.

Anyway y'all. We're goin to Maui!! [Insert excited scream!]

Brad came home not long ago and said, "Well...I have some news that I think you might like. Our company won a trip to Maui from one of our vendors and they want to send us." And, well, I was just a little excited about it. So...in a matter of time...of which I will not reveal on the internet...if you need me, you might find me...

here...at the swim-up bar with my new friends in the swim suits...

or here...on the beach...

or here...taking a break from the sun with a book in my hand...

and probably not here...but maybe...

but MOST DEFINITELY here...enjoying my humuhumuluke'anai massage

But don't worry, y'all. I'll probably take a few minutes while I'm there every day to update my status on Facebook or Twitter or post the day's adventures on my blog. I might even pin something on Pinterest!

Yippeee! My white legs are ready for some sun.

Goodbye. Hello.

2011. I'm bewildered...as I am every year...that it's over already. My mom always told me that I shouldn't wish my life away because it goes by so quickly and that I should enjoy my life now. She was right...as I'm finding that she was right about everything she told me.

It handed me life on a silver platter and I was fortunate to experience many firsts in 2011...

I painted my first masterpiece. Well...ok...there might be other adjectives more appropriate like...like...ummm...like... Well, my brain is still on vacation so I will just stick with masterpiece.


I ran my first half marathon ever. With my sister. In Austin, TX.

I started a shoe business. Wore my first pair of 4-inch heels. I closed a shoe business, and that's a story for another time!

Whoa Nelly! Those are some high heels y'all!

I became a great aunt for the first time to this darling. You might remember her face since I've posted a few times about her!
And...I memorized 24 Bible verses this year for the first time ever...to which I might say was a most powerful tool that walked me through many circumstances and days in 2011. It is a tool I will continue. Here is the list.

Brad and I enjoyed another year of walking with the Lord, mercy, grace, learning, good health, laughter, family, friends new and old, wonderful jobs, progress in many goals, and each other. If I haven't said it in a while, he has been and continues to be a God-send to me.

So goodbye 2011. I enjoyed the growth.
And hello 2012. I welcome you with this truth...

apart from Him I can do nothing
(John 15:5)

but...

I can do everything through Him who gives me strength
(Phil 4:13)

Back to reality

Today's post will be in list form and here's why. This is my last day of Christmas break and because I want to. That's why.

1) The dumbest thing I ever did was to resign as a fitness instructor. When my schedule got busy my workout was never compromised. Something else less important was thrown out. Now it's the first thing to go when I get busy. Makes staying fit a lot more challenging AND nobody pays me when I do! And y'all...I need exercise. I used to need it because I wanted to look good and for my clothes to sit and hang in all the right places, and while I still want that, I'm realizing I need it now more than ever to feel good. I seem to be more susceptible to colds and the flu and junk like that along with having new ache every day. I'm sure that some of it is due to getting a little older, but I refuse to ache because I don't have a regular workout schedule. So there.

2) My Christmas decorations are officially down. That makes me sad. I wish we could start celebrating Christmas in August. Haha. Not really. The Contemporary Christian station on Uverse is still playing Christmas songs today though, and I am squeezing in as much as I can before I go back to the real blah world on Monday.

My Christmas tree looks sad and naked.
Ok...so it's all down, but it's not put away yet. Waiting for someone to bring in the storage bins from the garage.

3) I need a new do. Really. And what I want is for it to look like Jennifer Aniston's hair all the time with the least amount of effort possible on my part. So if anyone has any ideas on how to make that happen, please let me know.

4) The countdown is on for my next half marathon and my training starts Monday. If you've never run one, I highly recommend it. I've never experienced something as exhilarating as crossing that finish line, and I can't wait to do it again. Please pray for no rain!

Happiest New Year!

Christmas 2011

Oh my goodness, y'all. I ate so much, and I think I'm still full from all the Christmas food that I consumed over the course of four days. I'm guessing that will make my quest to lose a few pounds in January that much more challenging. Well. Oh well.

This year Christmas was magical for me and I was overcome with so many memories of Christmases from my childhood and time spent with my grandparents. It was good for my soul.

Once again we were reminded of how truly blessed we are. Not at all because of things. But because of the people we get to love on and spend time with, and most of all because of the precious gift of salvation that we received from a beautiful God whose depth of love I will never fully grasp this side of heaven.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year...from us!

Remembering...

There are some moments in your life that are, unfortunately, branded on your heart and mind, and I will never forget where I was and what I was doing when I got the call that our friend Bayn was gone. I was drying my hair and getting ready to go finish my Christmas shopping when I got the initial call. And...I remember where I was when I spoke on the phone for the first time to a few of my coworkers after we all found out. I was making a cherry pie for the first time ever when Buffy called. I was on the couch crying when Shelley called. And I was in the parking lot of Kroger when Lisa called. And thinking back on that stirs up the same emotions and knot in my stomach that I had that day and that I carried around with me for the rest of the Christmas break. That was a year ago this week, and one of the most difficult things I've ever faced. I am sure my coworkers would agree as we had just been with him the Friday before at our monthly meeting and everything seemed fine. He was his usual Bayn self and little did we know that it would be our last time to see him. Things like that are hard to make sense of and seem to always be accompanied with the second-guessing of your own interactions with that person and thoughts like 'why didn't I pay more attention', or 'I wonder if he knew that I cared about him'. And...always makes me want to be a better person and friend.

Passionate is the most descriptive word I can think of for him because no matter what he liked or didn't like he did so with more passion than anyone I've ever known. You never had to guess how he felt about something. If he liked it, he loved it. If he disliked it, well...that was no secret either. But that was him, and his life ended way too abruptly and way too soon. He is sorely missed at work, and at our monthly meetings there is always something that isn't quite right now. His absence is felt deeply.

I pray you are resting peacefully, Bayn. Your sphere of influence was bigger than you probably knew or ever imagined.

Why me?

I sure can think of a lot of ways to be spending my time right now that are better than what I'm doing. Sleeping is at the top of the list. When you take a Zyrtec at 3 p.m. instead of right before bedtime, though, being awake at 1:44 a.m. tends to be the result. Boo. Hiss.

Which brings me to my next point. It sure is an inopportune time to be sick with a 'make everyone leave the room cough' and fever. I don't have my shopping and baking done and, well, I'm not even close to being done. I wonder if my loved ones would mind receiving some used Tupperware this year and some fudge from Rocky Mountain Chocolate Co. Boo. Hiss.

Anyway. I did get out this morning to get my shopping started and I picked up some goodies for most of the young people in my life. Teenage girls are so much easier to shop for than boys. Their toys are so much more expensive which leaves not a lot of choices for the aunts who are on a budget. But while I was out I was reminded a couple times that all the hurry and scurry of this season can bring out the worst in people. After being almost run over in the parking lot by someone who really needed that parking space and almost being knocked over in the aisle by a lady whose way I was in, I remembered why I prefer to get my shopping done early. Boo. Hiss.

But while I lay here awake in the middle of the night, I'm thankful that I have a good job that gives me a two week Christmas break, that I even have loved ones I need to buy Christmas gifts for, and that I'm snuggled up in a nice warm bed. So many only dream of having a fraction of that. And I wonder...why me?

I is not so smart after all...

I am fired from the tech position in my home. And that makes me glad.

Last week Brad told me that his mail was not updating on his phone and it kept giving him error messages. Friday he started having problems with his email on his computer, and because of our mad schedule last week and through the weekend I kept putting off the task of taking a looksie since I have been the resident help desk in our home. Well...Sunday he cornered me and stamped his feet and jumped up and down and said, "Woman, fix my email!". Ok...well that is a little exaggerated but that makes for a better story!

Anyway.

I finally sat down to troubleshoot Sunday evening before the debacle at Jerry's World. And as I thought through how to fix it, I walked myself through this kind of issue at work and decided to take the route that I would take at work. So I clicked here and I clicked there. Here a click. There a click. Everywhere a click click. Ahem. Ok...so...I set up a new profile for him. Proud...I started up that puppy and that dadgum thing still gave me the error that it was giving him. Stupid computer. So I said, "I'm leaving this error on here and you are going to have to call and find out that password tomorrow." Which...if he'd done that in the first place none of this would've happened. But that is neither here nor there.

The next morning my very frustrated husband called me at my desk and said, "I got the password and now I'm in email, but all of my calendar appointments are missing, I can't find any of my contacts, and I now only have 13 emails!!"

Uh-oh.

Of course you lost everything because 1) I didn't practice what I preach at work by backing things up before I removed, and clicked, and deleted, and rebooted. And 2) because...um...oh yes...at work we are on an Exchange server and when I set up a new profile for a user at work, their email just populates like it should.

So for the last two days my shoulders have been up in my ears and my stomach has been in knots and my eye has been twitching because my husband was at home wondering what appointments he was missing and wondering how he was going to get back all of the documents that he had stored in email. And. I. Felt. Horrible. And worried. And tense.

But God. Oh my. But God. Funny how I always get the opportunity at some point in a crisis to say that.

I went to work today with my shoulders in my ears and went down to see my friend who is one of the most spiritually mature women I've ever known. She is a prayer warrior and is armed and ready at any second of the day. I always go to her when I need advice, when I need to vent, and when I need to be reminded of Who I serve. So today I went to her and told her what happened and that I knew that God knows where that email file is and exactly how to restore it and that I needed Him to show me or Brad or someone what to do. So she said she would call her husband because he was pretty techie and might know of a way to restore it. So she called him and he said, "should I call Brad?" She said yes and so he did.

About an hour later I got a text from Brad telling me that Joe, Takeia's husband, walked him through a system restore and was able to locate and retrieve everything we thought he'd lost. Praise-a-llujah y'all!

It may not seem like a huge deal. But there is way more to the story than what is written here. He knew before I ever met Takeia that this was going to happen and that Joe was the guy he'd use to help troubleshoot the problem. He knew at this season in time that I would need a fresh reminder of Who He is and what He's about. He knew. And He cared. And He went before us to orchestrate a series of events that would lead me to this blog to give Him the Glory that is due Him.

And He knows what you're facing. He knows how big or how small it is to you. And He cares...regardless of the size. He's gone before you to bring you to the season that you're in. Don't panic. And...Don't give up on Him. He's writing a beautiful story with you as the lead character. Anticipate.

Anticipate something beautiful.

The little things

It's been a little bit since I posted about things for which I am thankful, and I've come up with some things that make me smile.

1) Large text on my iPhone. Oh my. Mamaw can see, y'all!

2) Vince Gill's Christmas album, "Let There Be Peace On Earth". It's from a long time ago and it is go-ood.

3) Laughter. This one got me good and I laughed so hard I quit making noise and all I could do was slap my knee.

4) Technology. This is my mom getting a reading from her pacemaker to let her know all is well. And that gets a double dose of thankful.

And along those same lines I'm thankful for the Internet. I couldn't remember the word pacemaker so I googled "thing inside your chest to regulate your heartbeat" and voila - pacemaker popped up!

5) App updates. Yay!! Now I can play a Beth Moore video from the Life Today app without it stopping every time my iPhone screen goes to sleep!

6) The Original Bed Buddy Hot & Cold Pack. Woooweeee! I just throw that puppy in the microwave for one minute and apply the OBB to wherever mamaw hurts!

That's all...till next time.

Because my mom did it...

Saturday night eight other couples will gather at our house for our 3rd annual couples' Christmas bunko and I am so excited about it. It really is fun for people who like loud, and I do if it involves laughter and silliness, and this party does. It does.

Anyway, I went to the grocery store to get all the ingredients for all the food I'm going to make and I do believe that if I ever need a job as a cook for the army, I will have quite a resume to give them. I get it from my mom. My dad was a pastor and every year at Christmas we would have this big open house at Christmas and invite the whole church and my mom would cook for several days beforehand. Oh the food. It was everywhere. And. It. Was. Good. And so that's why I do it. Because my mom did.

Anyway...tonight I made my first yummy. It is a recipe I got from my friend, Tracy. I don't know what the actual name of it is called so I call it Tracy's Mix of Goodness. Here it is...

1 egg white
1/2 c sugar
1/2 t cinnamon
1/2 t salt
1 c almonds
2 c pretzels
1 c dried cranberries

Whip the egg white and add the sugar, cinnamon, and salt to it. Pour over the other. Bake for an hour at 225 - stirring every 15 minutes.

OMG.

Buffalo gals wontcha come out tonight...

I can't get to the end of the holiday season without watching It's a Wonderful Life at least three times because it is my all-time favorite Christmas movie! I love George Bailey and all his "silly stupid kids" and it is just not Christmas for me without him.

Sometimes I am like George Bailey, and sometimes I need a wake up call to remind me of all that I've got. It is no secret that I long to have children, yet at 43, have still not been blessed in that way. It is a struggle that I have dealt with for a really long time and have experienced much grief around the issue. The holidays are especially difficult because I'm surrounded with the reminder that I don't get the opportunity to experience the story of Baby Jesus, Santa or the Elf on the Shelf with my own little ones. At every turn, I'm surrounded by friends and acquaintances that are blessed in this very way. And I grieve all over again. It is the thing that hangs over my head and threatens my faith much like George Bailey's unsolicited inheritance - Bailey Bros. Building & Loan. Sometimes I'm able to hide the pain, and sometimes I'm not.

But. I didn't say all that to fish for some sympathy. I wrote it because the pain is raw again, and since I've walked this road for so long and because I've learned so much about Who God is, I need to acknowledge it and put it in its proper perspective. If I don't acknowledge it, it is the thing that can set my mind in motion to full on destruction and get me in a terrible place emotionally for a good amount of time...and...going to that place serves no purpose for the common good of me, my family, or anyone who crosses my path. Those are rags that I'm learning to not put back on again in my journey to being clothed in strength.

I also mention it because I know that I'm not alone. I know that there are others who feel this kind of pain every day. Maybe it's not the inability to have children. Maybe it's nothing like that. Whatever it is, it is real and it is valid, and I wholly believe that you (and I) are loved and you (and I) have not been forgotten.

In the movie, George is down and out, and things have gone south, and he sits at a bar and prays. He then encounters Clarence and it gets worse from there and everyone is acting weird and nobody even knows him including his wife and mother. When Clarence asks him why he's bleeding, he says, "I got a bust in the jaw in answer to a prayer." I've felt like George. I've thought many times that my prayers don't matter, but ALWAYS at the end of a season, I've been able to look back and see that God did answer my prayers. Not always has He answered in the way I prayed, but He's always made me well aware that He heard me and His answers have always been for my good. I will not stop praying for what matters to my heart.

It IS a wonderful life. I get to wake up every day to a wonderful husband who loves me; I was placed in two families who would go to the ends of the earth for me; I am surrounded by a plethora of friends who are like family to me; and I am blessed beyond measure.

Acknowledge your pain, give it it's due attention, cry out to God and tell Him how it hurts. And then...go...give your guardian angel his wings!

Surrender

Have you ever been in a situation where you know beyond the shadow of a doubt that God is trying to get your attention about something because everywhere you turn you see or hear something around the same topic? Have you ever been so worried that if you surrender yourself and your life to Christ that He will make you get rid of all your things and move to Africa?

Well.

So.

Hmmmm.

It all started a couple years ago when my brother sent us a letter about a missions trip to Zambia he would be participating in with his church and asked that we prayerfully consider helping him to raise funds to help him go. At that time we were down to one income and our pennies were being stretched as far as possible so we were only able to help by praying for him. The next year, we received another letter from him with the same request for another trip to Zambia. It 'just so happened' (I love it when things 'just so happen'!) that around that same time Brad's boss had requested each partner to find a charity or organization that the company could donate money to. Each would be receiving a generous donation. Brad chose my brother.

Fast forward 4 months to early December 2010. We were out Christmas shopping and 'just so happened' to stop in Family Christian...where World Vision had set up a kiosk to sponsor a child from another country. The kiosk was magnetic and we could not leave the store. We chose Eric. He is from Rwanda.

About a month ago, my brother emailed me on my birthday and at the end of his greeting asked if we wanted to go with them to Zambia next summer. I replied and gave him some excuses as to why we can't. And then I talked with my husband about it and he was interested in finding out more about it, so I emailed my brother back and asked for the dates. He sent me an attachment with all the info and said, "Don't let the cost scare you. If God wants you to go, he will make a way."

And since that day we have been bombarded with something about Africa At. Every.Turn. !!

I don't know what He has in store. Maybe He's not going to have us get rid of our life as we know it and move to Africa. Maybe He just wants us to go on a missions trip there. Maybe not. What I do know is this...

Psalm 139:1-10
1 O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. 2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. 3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. 4 Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord. 5 You hem me in –behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. 7 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? 8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. 9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, 10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.

Where are all the snuggies?

I've known for about a month now that my gift for my angel was due on Wednesday morning, November 30th. That's right...a month. Now, I've taken the time to put an appointment on my calendar every day in the last month to pick up a snuggie for my angel because "I don't want to try to have to find one at the last minute". AND on that appointment I have taken the time to set up an alert 15 minutes beforehand so that I will not forget. Well, I snoozed that appointment till the next day every single day for the last month. And like a champ...waited till this evening to go buy a snuggie for my angel. I couldn't find one! Walgreens - none. CVS - nope! Target - uh no! Kirklands - not this year! Well...until I stopped at Bed, Bath, and Beyond which is now my most favorite store on the planet. So, I will deliver my angel gift tomorrow morning and pray that this 15-year old boy is surrounded by the warmth and comfort of his new snuggie among all the other joys every boy his age should be experiencing at this most blessed time of year.

Guest Blogger

Y'all I'm so excited to introduce my first guest blogger today! Her name is Jenn and she is my married to my nephew, Chad, so technically she's my niece. I am honored to claim her as so.

This girl knows what it means to be clothed in strength. She is in love with Jesus and it shows in her every action...and if ever there was a threat to the adversary...she is it.

Oh yeah...and she is the mother of my great-niece, Anna Grace. If this doesn't make your heart flitter, I don't know what will.

Please go. Read her beautiful Thanksgiving post.

Enjoy...and Happy actual Thanksgiving today!!

Please pass the joy

In less than 12 hours the first of the Thanksgiving guests will arrive. I have visited the grocery store more than enough in the last two days but realized a few minutes ago that I still forgot the cherry pie filling! Hope there's some left.

So I'm mostly prepared for guests with enough food to fill their bellies while they're here, but I have to wonder if I'm prepared to fill their time here with grace. I fear I'm not. I fear I'm getting lost in the Martha mentality...rushing to fill my fridge and decorate my house and clean the floors and wash the sheets. And while those things are done and my house is ready to receive our guests, my soul feels barren and my 'joy' tank is running on fumes. And this...precisely this...is the exact opposite of what this holiday is all about. And in my search tonight of how I need to fill my tank, I'm humbled by the fact that I can't. I cannot serve myself up a dish of peace, love, and joy no matter how hard I try or put my mind to it. My resolve to just be dadgum peaceful is not just gonna happen. But...(there's always a but) what I do have is access to it. I have been graced with everything I need to have an overflow and all I have it do is put it on.

Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.
(Col 3:12)

Because I am chosen and dearly loved! I dont have to do these things in order to be chosen and dearly loved...I already am. And so are you. All I have to do is take off my old rags and put on my new duds. They are there folded nice and neatly and ready to be worn. I pray I can. I pray that I'm so clothed with those virtues this week that my guests go home filled...not by turkey and gravy and buttery rolls, but by the fact they have been in the presence of Grace.

And my prayer is the same for you. That you are able to don the beauty of patience when Grandpa tells the same jokes he told last year. And the beauty of compassion when cousin invites you to her pity party. And the beauty of gentleness when Aunt's green bean casserole is missing an important ingredient. And certainly the beauty of kindness when sister-in-law serves you some tofurkey! I pray you would be filled with the wonder of Grace and that those who cross your path are profoundly affected because of it.

Happy Thanksgiving.

20 Years

So I remember what I was going to write about the other night when I started a post by saying how truly baffled I am at how quickly time passes by and then fell asleep in the middle of it. Mamaw needs her sleep! Anyway...I am baffled by how quickly time passes and last weekend I spent time with people I haven't seen in 20 years. 20 years! And when I graduated from college 20 years ago I had no idea how quickly it would go. Regardless, my 20-year college reunion was upon me and I was excited to see sweet friends who knew and loved me unconditionally during my most awkward stage of life. Most people's awkward stage is in middle school but I was always a little behind and mine graced me in college.

So my sister who was celebrating her 25-year reunion picked me up on her way up from Austin, and we went together. And we had 3 hours in a car by ourselves uninterrupted for the first time in at least 15 years and we did not allow any lull in the conversation!

After we arrived in OKC we went to the campus for the men's homecoming basketball game. They have built a new center for the basketball and put an area above the basketball court for reunioners which is where we all stood during the game to catch up. Afterward we went to our class parties - first to mine and then to Patti's. My cheeks hurt after smiling and laughing so much. But it was fun and good to see these people.

Then Saturday after our reunion luncheons we went back to my folks' house and my nephew came over and brought his cutie wife and baby and we got to spend some time with them. My nephew loves to be with us because we giggle at everything he says and the more we giggle the more he performs for us. And speaking of how time goes by so quickly, he is a father! I remember going with his mother to drop him off at his first day of Kindergarten. I had a huge lump in my throat that day and now he's a daddy! And the same emotions that caused the lump in my throat that day are still stirred by him and all my nephews and nieces, who are also grown, and I still get the same lump when they reach milestones today.

Time does go fast. I want to spend it soaking up the blessing of waking up every day, and I want to spend it loving others well. I haven't always. But it's not to late to start.

Rambling

Sometimes I'm truly baffled by how quickly time passes. And I know it does and I often dpdddddfs

Ok. That first "paragraph" was something I started while I was laying in bed last night. I guess I fell asleep with my finger on the d on my smartphone keyboard. And...well...I have no idea what I was going to write about but I guess I had been overcome by the realization of how quickly time passes by.

Anyway.

Pinterest. I'm totally addicted. Totally. I have a lot of pins and a lot of projects on the list. Enough to keep me busy for the next 3 or 4 years. I started with this and I love it.

It is hanging in my entry way and I love it, by the way.

I also pinned this on my Organization board because I love organization.


Now...I'm not organized at all, but I love the idea, and I admire people who are. So...when I saw this idea on Pinterest, I was pumped because for $1.39, the area under my kitchen sink was going to become a really cool place. But when I did it, this is what happened. And, y'all...it won't stay, and I am not a natural DIYer, so I have no idea what gadget to go buy to make it work. Please help.

I'm done rambling now. Centennial High School is in the playoffs and they are spanking every team that darkens their doorstep. So I gotta go watch my niece cheer them on. Go Titans!

COST - co

I really should have known before we went that getting out of Costco with just the two items on our list was wishful thinking! I mean I had convinced my man to go with me and that it would be fun and I just wanted to get a couple things and we wouldn't be there very long. And so I'm not sure if I was trying to convince him or myself! Because, well...we didn't make it out of there with only two items, and our $20 turned into...ummm...$100. But. It was fun. So I was right about one thing!

Veggie Straws. Holy deliciousness! Go get some.

Lighted make-up mirror. Now maybe my make-up won't look so scary every day and one eye won't have more eye shadow than the other. It's always good to shed a little light into the darkness!

We use to have this flimsy white piece of paper covering us.

And it would cause our bedspread to be like this.

And I was like - dang!

But now we have this warm, snuggly blanket for our bed.

With this one our bedspread doesn't fall to the floor. And now I'm like - hooray!

It's a good thing I bought a huge package of lunch meat because I'll need it when the army gets here! No photo because we've already eaten a good portion of it and there's not enough left for the army!

And finally relief for my arthritic neck. Embarrassing. I know. But yes - arthritis. With this wonderful new tempur-pedic (sp?) pillow, I no longer wake up with a sore neck! Hallelujah!

And then there were a couple personal items. But I'm not going to tell what they are because it's personal!

I heart Costco. So glad there's a brand new one right across the street. Guess I'll need to continue to work so I can fund the habit.